During my service year, I met a lady from one of the geopolitical regions around Nigeria. I thought she was firm, ambitious, focused, determined, extroverted, loving, audacious and talented, until I was told otherwise based on her temperament.

Vera: Becca, you’re trying o. You really can tolerate people, especially someone like Donne, I can’t even pretend

Me:  But I don’t have to pretend.

Vera: I know right! You are special. Not sure anyone in this PPA can accept the rubbish she does

Me: For real?

Vera: Yes, the other time, she took over the orientation programme without being asked to do so

Me: But she only volunteered, anyone could have done that. In fact, she saved the moment

Vera: What about the time she reported an examination malpractice to the principal

Me: But i also did same. Why are you not complaining about me?

Vera: Not because you’re here, Becca. But hers is different.

Me: Really?

Vera: There is nothing good ever coming out of her Nazareth. She is rude, arrogant, self-centered…

Me: (snapped) That’s a terrible thing to say

Vera: See…I just can’t deal. Please, talk to her

The scenario above, played out every other time when there is a gist around my friend and I find it unfair for people to judge her that way. Donne goes the extra mile for others just to make sure they are alright. She doesn’t mind carrying all the responsibilities or creating one for herself for the express success of a task or project. She’s always with the “Let’s do it now” attitude – a born leader.

I accept that she is blunt, – never hides anything behind the grandiosity of words. For her, it’s a say as we go! Also, she is undaunting and it plays out in the way she confronts issues and people alike. She stepped on so many toes and acquired many enemies but yeah, I love her still.

Donne’s Temperament

Above all, it was in the very nature of my friend to be all those and more. She finds it confusing sometimes when she hears certain things said about her person. On the contrary, she listens when I talk to her and has a soft way of curling back, only that she will jump at the next opportunity to act even if it’s the following second.

She is a Chol-Mel Temperament Blend

Donne has a combination of Choleric and Melancholic referred to as the Chol/Mel for short- it is a temperament type. Temperaments are the way our inner being has come to appear. It is the plain on which our personality is built. If our personality is a combination of our education, socialization, family influence, and interpersonal pressure ( all those things that affect our behaviours over time), then, Temperament is rather innate and gives a definition to our personality.

Next on Temperament!

  • What is the implication of a blend of temperaments, i.e Chol-mel, San/Phleg
  • Can I change my temperament or do people get to accept me the way I am?
  • Why do different temperaments irritate me?
  • Is one temperament better than the other?

Thanks for reading… Stay tuned for the next post

Author

Rebecca Maulome Padonu is an enthusiastic writer with a soft spot for factions. A RubyWrites 2016 finalist. She has completed several freelance writing projects, including BBC Media Action’s Drama series, Story Story (series 32 & 33).

2 Comments

  1. On the temperament issues: most people are usually quick to judge forward and fast thinking people reason that they feel they do eye service. This piece is simply insightful and enlightening.
    Thanks Becca.

    • You’re right Haruna. We really need to understand people and not judge every single action they take. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I appreciate your kind words too.

Write A Comment