Hello there, how are you today? Belated Happy Elections day! It’s four days already! Wow!. So, situation reports from the polling units on Saturday have it that there was a drastic change in the turnout compared to the Presidential elections. Well, people came up with a lot of reasons why we had such negative results, with fear of violence topping the list.

But for me, I think people do not reverence any other leadership position apart from the President’s. Also, people have finally lost hope in the entire process.

Anyways, amidst all these, a friend has found time to write a piece “Dear Madam Ex”. His name is Awugo Julius. Enjoy the letter below:

Dear Madam Ex,

It’s been approximately six months since our relationship kicked a dead end. It was quiet shocking, for how things turned out. Given how beautiful and smooth sailing everything was from the beginning.

The long walks. The kisses.The hugs.The endless conversations that bloomed of nothing short of glorious sweetness. In each others company the sun appeared, and disappeared in a matter of seconds. As an hour with you felt like a split second. We couldn’t enjoy enough of each others company.

To me, I had found my Miss. Right, as you, your Mr. Right. But time is a bitch, soon it reveals  the true nature of things without interference.

On the day we arrived at the decision to go our separate ways. Your tears will flow, as I held you in my arms. Soon, my shirt will get drenched. I knew I had to let you go, but giving into that was a too difficult call to make.

We will be all over each other again. The kisses. The hugs, and the smell of you collapsing my defenses. For a brief moment, we will reverse the status quo. The fire in our breath will return. Our breathing will be hushed up  blood rushing to our ears. This time everything will pierce through.

Your sweat, my sweat, flowing ceaselessly, as the form a confluence in our Lokoja. This time we will go at each other with so much force.

It is clear. Much love is lost.

Madam Ex. We both should share the blame for the failed relationship. On many fronts I was culpable for not dictating your lies in time. And when I realized how easy and convenient it was for you to lie to my face. And lie again. I lost every fabric of trust I had for you.

Everything you said, did or front was a suspicion for another lie.

You have been very vocal about not marrying someone whose dedication to God had about a yard of question mark, riding over it. Right from the beginning of our relationship you voiced this concerns loud enough.

As time hurried by, you were largely worried by my inability to shift grounds. You made it clear you wanted out. At month end you would want me to round up ten percent of my total earnings for that month. Carefully package it in a white envelope and deliver it to pastor as tithe.  This I refused, explaining to you how much a fraud, the concept of tithe giving or tithe taking is. But you would not believe.

Madam Ex. A few guys like me have been vested with the daunting responsibility of rescuing Africa from its sheer blindness. Its dire uselessness when confronted by the lies and fallacies carefully woven and marketed on the pulpit.

Africa is blind. She had her eyes roughly plucked off like Edipus. Worse so, her citizenry have lost their ability to think. They allow religious leaders think for them.

All my life, I have been a rebel. Refusing to comform with what society thinks everybody should uphold. Rebellion is beautiful. It’s a huge demonstration of courage and tenacity. But like most people before you, you refuse to see the sense in the logical arguments that I front. The shinning light and constructive nature of my rebellion.

So madam Ex. Your lack of believe has largely brought us here. Instead you choose to believe whatever your pastor says no matter how illogical it may seem. The other day he said, one must speak out when praying to God. And then I asked a simple question requesting to know how deaf and dumb will do that. Your answer Ex. Broke my heart. Showed that you were damaged, almost beyond repair.

It’s funny how the word that defines us now sounds more like the variable X that is used to find the value of unknown things in mathematics. Maybe it’s likely if we use the variable X we can find the true cause of the break up. The equation could read as follows:

If you and me are known  variables. Find the true reason for breakup after one year and eight months of dating.

 X could be the temporary value for the reason for our break up. Using that formula, our LCM can be collected and the true reason for the breakup arrived at.

Whatever the true reason for the relationship not working, it’s no longer important. What matters most is that we both have moved on. More so the wedding bells have rang loudly all around you. Makes one poised to ask, if truly your new relationship started after we parted ways. Or you kept both me and him running at the same time.

Much does not matter anymore.

You might never get to read this, but if you do. I pray he treats you better than I did.


Awugo Julius


Rebecca Maulome Padonu is an enthusiastic writer with a soft spot for factions. A RubyWrites 2016 finalist. She has completed several freelance writing projects, including BBC Media Action’s Drama series, Story Story (series 32 & 33).


  1. Julius!!! How I missed reading your writings.

    Now our last discussion on the streets of Wuse makes sense. You’re a strong man with big dreams. Keep living to fullness.

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